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7 Spiritual Reasons Why People Are Mean

At 6:48am one morning, my phone received a text message.  Reading it, my heart hurt immediately; I could feel the depth of hurt that had generated this question:

“Jen, why are people so mean?”

I wondered what had already happened in my friend’s day to make her ask such a thing.

She acknowledged that some people might be mean because they were not raised with love, as she herself had been, but then said, “is there a bigger, cosmic reason why people are mean?”

I pledged to take some time to consider the issue deeply, and once I had done so, this was my multifaceted–and multidimensional–response:


“My first answer is that I don’t know… My heart has long wondered the same thing. Being mean is so counter to who you and I are that it doesn’t compute.

“But that doesn’t answer the question.

  1. “So next, I’ll say that the souls here are from different places in the cosmos. Some come from very dark or harsh realities. So that is their essence: harsh, cruel.
  2. “Also, Earth used to be controlled fundamentally by Dark forces, so the Dark ensured that Earth was well stocked with tortured souls. And then ensured that conditions on Earth would maintain the suffering. Darkness feeds off of suffering.
  3. “So the human body has, over a long period of time, been altered by extreme suffering. And even bright souls who inhabit these vessels are subject to some of the genetic manipulation of the past. We have to deal with some of the suffering that came before us. So our very bodies are programmed to be mean.
  4. “Next, being mean is the first response that the brain generates. It takes effort to subdue that mean impulse, wait a second, and react instead from a place of balance. Many people are a) lazy (so they don’t do the work necessary to pause and react better); and b) too damaged to care about being less mean.
  5. “As well, the energies of/hitting Earth have been bringing suppressed issues to the surface. The planet is exploding with instability; people are spinning out. So meanness is amplified and we may be noticing it more.
  6. “Last, we’re in North America–a culture raised to be selfish, and that has no sense of community and sharing. If you were elsewhere in the world, like some South American or African cultures, then you might find that people are kinder. Because they feel more connected to each other.
  7. “A more random phenomenon is that the Dark will take over someone’s mind temporarily and cause them to attack you or other light-bringers. They do it as a way to take us down.

“I think the Buddhists would say that we have to find a way to be even more compassionate towards these people, because their meanness comes from a place of suffering. But if you’ve ever encountered a truly mean person then you know they can’t be reasoned with–their emotions blind them. So the strategy is: do not engage; then feel compassion for them (from a distance). And let it go.”


At the end of my message, I still had to admit to my friend, “None of this logic helps my heart to feel more at peace.”

Some of us simply come from realms of compassion and kindness, and to encounter any cruelty or deliberate harm is felt deeply by our hearts.


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